The Short Tonies have gone to America!!!

We sat in the Village Pub discussing their impending holiday.

“It’s the food I’m really looking forward to,” said Short Tony. “Big portions.”

“That’s not necessarily true,” I warned him. “I’ve been to California and the food is rubbish. They don’t have flavours.”

“What do they eat in Florida then?”

I was a bit nonplussed by this. “Oranges, I guess. And Democrats.”

Flying on April Fool’s Day is always fun, with the amusing jokes and pranks you can play at the immigration desk. But, truth be told, I am a bit worried about his visit. Recently he has once more turned up at somebody’s house in the middle of the night slightly drunk and urgently requesting a darts game. Eddie was flying to Australia the next day, so wasn’t up for it and, in fact, hid in the back room – but the point is that if he does this on holiday then he might get shot as an intruder. This is America we are talking about after all, not sleepy Norfolk.

Either that or he will come back as a different actor, like on Neighbours.

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